In Plain English

Reversing Ripley: Telling a Story Your Reader Can Believe

Three writing techniques can make the unlikely seem natural - foreshadowing the surprise, establishing a solid foundation, and showing more than telling.

By Mary Barnard Ray

I like to collect characters and settings. I fill in the time while waiting in line by imagining how a person's demeanor or a physical setting could create a feeling or illustrate a point. But some characters and settings are unusable, simply because the truth is not believable. For example, consider the man who repaired my cuckoo clock many years ago.

His shop was no more than 9 x 9 feet in size, and only one window provided a shaft of light on the worn wood floor. Before eyes could adjust to the dimness, ears would register the ticking of hundreds of clocks. Clocks lined the walls from floor to ceiling, so that scores of pendula were moving, each in its own rhythm. Rather than the soothing regularity of one pendulum, the movement reminded one of a swarm of insects. In the darkness, the walls seemed infested with clocks.

The owner, who worked in the back room, shuffled out, a man about five feet tall, with stooped shoulders, long white hair, and delicate hands. His bright brown eyes peered at the customer through small, round, wire-rimmed glasses. Smiling, he introduced himself as Mr. T. Tock.

Although a writer of fiction can cast aside the incredible situation, you as a legal writer have no choice. You face the challenge of making the unbelievable or the unlikely seem natural. This writing situation requires some special handling. Three techniques most likely to be useful are foreshadowing the surprise, establishing a solid foundation, and showing more than telling.

Foreshadow the unbelievable

Prepare your reader for the incredible information before you present it fully. So, for example, I referred to the credibility issue before I started my description of the clock shop and its proprietor. Similarly, you might open your account of a fire with a reference to your unlikely fact.

"This fire, which led to the injury of two fire fighters and dozens of the Home's residents, was caused by the failure to turn off the heat in one oven."

In effect, this allows you to tackle the problem of credibility head on. You take the initiative to create a question in the reader's mind ("Is that really the cause of this much damage?"), and then you explain the facts that lead the reader to answer that question in the way you want. This leads to the next step.

Establish a solid foundation

Lead your reader systematically through all the facts or law or reasoning that is needed to support your answer. Thus, I detailed the appearance of the room first and saved the name, potentially the silliest fact, for the end. I was hoping that this sequence would establish a context that could reduce the distracting unlikelihood of the name itself.

Show, don't tell

When describing the hard-to-believe facts, resist the urge to shortcut the process by describing with your own modifiers, the conclusion you want the reader to reach. Thus, the dimensions of the shop, the cause of the dim lighting, and the approximate number of clocks are more effective at building credibility with a skeptical reader than a shorter, conclusory description.

"The shop was small, dark, and infested with clocks."

By characterizing the facts rather than presenting them in sufficient detail, the writer forces the reader to trust the writer's judgment.

Legal readers want to draw their own conclusions, and generally they have an obligation to do so. Saying "trust me on this," even in more believable situations, is one of the quickest ways to lose credibility with a legal reader. For example, the following sentence may make the reader feel uneasy.

"When asked where he had been, he seemed uneasy."

Instead, discipline yourself to present the facts that show the situation in the light you want.

"When asked where he had been at 10 p.m., the time the assault had taken place, he looked away and mumbled, 'Nowhere.'"

This allows the reader to see the situation and draw his or her own conclusion based upon verifiable facts, a conclusion that the reader can trust.

Conclusion

In summary, credibility in statements of fact, even in incredible situations, is earned in writing through thorough preparation, organization, and attention to detail. In incredible situations, thorough preparation means foreshadowing the situation. Organization means establishing a foundation for your incredible assertions. Attention to detail means showing the facts rather than telling the conclusion. Thus, writing about incredible situations differs in degree, not in nature, from the legal writer's constant obligation to provide the reader with sufficient information.

Wisconsin Lawyer